Here is a rant I went on against a Star Wars fan who had posted on imdb "Star Wars returns to theaters in February!"
I had argued that The Phantom Menace is what is being released in February and that it
doesn't deserve the name Star Wars and that it was like
saying The Star Wars Holiday Special and the Ewoks cartoon are Swar Wars.
"The Six features are cannon.
Each film is as much Star Wars as the other."
- sanoma6
This is like saying Godfather Part III is
automatically on a par with its predecessors.
Or Jaws The Revenge is inherently as valid as
Jaws or Jaws 2.
Or that Dumber and Dumberer: When Harry met Lloyd
is anywhere near as good as Dumb and Dumber.
I'm sure Oliver Stone considers Wall Street 2:
Money Never Sleeps "canon" in his work.
Side note: Even though nobody would argue that TV's
Young Indiana Jones prequels are as engaging as the features, they were all released on VHS in numbered
sequence, including the features, counted as one long
epic and all Cannon by Lucas. And as much as I am a defender of Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, I don't
dare say it is "as much Indy" as Raiders of the Lost Ark.
The Star Wars prequels are counterfeit Star Wars, even
if they come from the same printing press as real Star Wars.
They are inferior, and they have sunk a strong brand which
declined in value sharply after May 19, 1999.
Oddly, because the Clone Wars animated show require so much
content they are farmed out to a team of other writers and
directors. Despite being in an era that involves characters
I don't prefer, they are close to the tone of the OT.
The stories are all competant and often compelling, and
certainly fun.
But the Clone Wars feature - at a time when animated
features do good business - is regarded as the least
successful SW feature and Phantom Menace the "most
successful" which is nonsense.
The brand was damaged. I saw Clone Wars in a theater
and I didn't actually mind the baby Hutt because it
was the "boon" that is followed in good adventure
storytelling. It, arguably, is cannon, financed
and ordered by Lucas. But the distinction of "cannon"
means nothing.
People were burned from Phantom Menace through Sith.
Only the most hardcore fans will read all the novels
and comics, the rights to which are basically whored
out by now. Timothy Zahn's forst trilogy of post-Jedi
novels brought fans back from the late-eighties nadir
of Star Wars when the Marvel Comics had ended their
SW run and Kenner opted not to renew its licencing with
Lucasfilm. (On that last point it is terrific that Lucas
got the last laugh when Kenner was bought out by Hasboro
and Lucas was given half ownership of Hasboro in the late
nineties as the price of a new licence agreement when the
hype had returned with re-releases and optimism about the
prospect of Episode One.) How sad that Hasboro has gone
through Post-Menace period of being ready to give away
action figures, when KFC and Taco Bell cringed at the
prequel decorations in their restaurancts, and Exhibitors
resented the contract Lucas had insisted upon which kept
their screens occupied by The Phantom Menace weeks after
word of mouth caused audiences to dwindle.
The hard bargain Lucas once drove couldn't happen by the
time the Clone Wars feature was being made. He ended up
cutting a deal with Warner, but he got a lot of rejections
and for a while there were no takers even for the quite
good Tv series.
What is especially bothersome about these upcoming 3D
releases is that they will only be accepted by exhibitors
because of the 3D gimmich, which won't be Avatar quality.
it will just be another way to condition us for the regular
ticket fees to be jacked up again, even for non-3D movies.
Fans have to learn to be more critical. Nobody is really
asking for the prequels to hit theaters again. When Lucas
first showed examples of the 3D conversion at Comic-Con it
was scenes from the 1977 Star Wars made 3D.
So all this talk of a year to complete that process
is nonsense - HE HAS HAD FOUR YEARS SINCE THEN,
and has ALREADY GOT A NEW HOPE CONVERTED.
That COULD be the first one released. But he KNOWS
if he shows the OT first, nobody will go to the
prequels. And he floats a bully stance that "the
older films will be released in 3D if these ones
do well." Which is like saying "eat three turds,
with nothing to cleanse the pallet, and then I
will give you the best cheezeburger available."
The re-release of the prequels needs to be boycotted.
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