Just a quick thanks to the millions of people who check my blog every day. For them, I have to take the time to at least make this one entry whether I have anything to say or not.
Spiritually, if I take the time to think about it, I'm staring into the abyss.
I don't have enough authority and influence to merely insist that my films get made, but I do have the certainty and understanding of the world to know when to say no.
Suppose a "producer-director" wants to take over one of my projects. The logic of some might be that it is worth his/her "in" as a producer to "make it happen" to give up the position of director. But I know that - apart from established movie stars and those way out of reach - any producer worth having must be a PRODUCER, provider, logistics-oriented. That doesn't mean that they get to "play" as director just because it is considered more of an "artistic expression." It is RARE that an excellent director is also an excellent producer.
I was randomly musing as I left the subway today how silly it is that people persist with the "don't look a gift horse in the mouth" message they apparently get from The Trojan Horse story. I've said this before, but I say DEFINITELY look a gift horse in the mouth. If there are no soldiers inside waiting to attack your castle once they arfe through the gate, cool. Your ally won't be offended that you have a head on your shoulders.
And even though I have other scripts and other projects I could end up directing, guess what? I'm choosing the BEST one to focus on first. I'm going through all of them and giving them another run through the word processer, because it feels like a more fertile or desperate time of my life when I might really focus and fight and not assume that because I wrote it and it took a long time it must be good. Most if not all of the scripts I read from undiscovered peers are naive -- often including those that have been celebrated and boosted by screenwriting circles or circle-jerks.
My bios around 2001 used to say "writer-director-security guard." I'm not sure they all do now, since nine years later it isn't as funny or benign.
I'm starting to REALLY rely on the handful of people who like my shorts and join my team to make movies. And I owe them. I didn't move to Toronto and reduce contact with my parents and siblings to be a security guard. I want to take the mediocre film industry and uneven film festivals and grab them by the caller and bash their heads against something. Nothing but money stops people from making a movie; it's just a matter of the quality and what kind of performance is captured. I know I can't do my next short - let alone feature - under the same compromised conditions. People can't be persuaded to participate because it "won't take long." I know I want to get through it fast because I expect it to fall apart like one of my projects in 2005 did. People have to be committed and informed about the time that might be needed. There is NOTHING I can do about lines not being learned or people deciding they can't show up for a rehearsal -- other than re-cast, which is something that must be on the table from the start.
As confident as I am about writing and directing, I am not so confident about producing. And by producing I don't mean throwing money at problems. Too many people may think this is about wanting to avoid leg work. Of COURSE I want to avoid leg work. If we have a producer for a feature, that person should be able to do leg work more quickly and efficiently than I can. Just like an EDITOR if it is someone other than me, or the cinematographer had better KNOW THE TOOLS better than I do. That really isn't asking much. Moreover, if I am right brain, they must be left brain and vice versa. There is no point having a bunch of daydreamers who can't screw in a lightbulb.
James Cameron and Steven Spielberg can produce and direct, yes. And they are unique people. But I know I'm not a genius. I'm more of a savant. I can write and rewrite, as long as mediocrity isn't calling the shots. And I can direct, although I'd rather not pay to bump the production values and be a half-ass producer and ultimately shoot myself in the foot again. If you see my name as a producer, that means the show has been compromised. I haven't done my taxes yet in May when I only have two pieces of paper to submit and some TTC passes, yet I'll never give up on my scripts.
